Saturday, February 21, 2009

Essays On Forgiveness: Hope, Faith, and Love

I had to look this up.

1 Corinthians 13 (New International Version): Love

1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

I'm sort of ashamed that I first learned of this passage from a movie/book involving a dying woman straddling state lines. Then again the agonizing truth would be to admit crying when reading the novel--after purposely looking for the novel when it did come out in 2000. I have a perverse and morbid anger when it comes to clichés to be honest and the second section of this biblical passage is no exception. Well, up until now.

It has taken an estranged cousin reaching out from halfway across the world to make me examine my conscience by sharing his own stories. It seems wherever you are, love will find you and hurt you. That's why Cupid is drawn pulling on compound reflex bows and having a quiver of blood red arrows instead of tangoing about flinging rose petals and popcorn.

Fittingly enough, the last line of 1 Corinthians 13 sounds exactly like something I would write. In fact I have been jotting down complex bubble diagrams about these three things: faith, hope, and love. For many of us, these words have become cliché--once extremely meaningful, now just pandered about to fill spaces. For me the equation derived from these three words have become part of daily living.

Faith comes from the Latin fidem--Trust. A deep rooted trust in the solidity or reality of something or someone. To accept faith, I had to lose it first. When I was younger and had fallen in love for the first time, I had a rock solid belief that no matter how rough things got, my love would cast aside obstacles. I sought proof in the law and with authorities: judges, monsignors, even and finally, parents. I believed that prayers for a love born out of innocence were enough. That no matter how bleak it seemed it would work out and the relationship would grow. I knew then that He would not let me down. I knew for a fact that He would find a way. I trusted. He had other plans. I lost my faith then, and very nearly, my life.

Much later on I learned that to have real faith, one must first strive to understand the why and what of what they trust. With understanding, comes acceptance of real faith, as faith is an active living thing we must nurture.

Hope. You would think that hope would not be able to survive without faith, but it does. Life is biblical like that I guess. I wandered for a long time in a wilderness wherein I thought myself to be a mighty hunter. I created psalms for every season and ended up looking for grapes where there were none. I was alone and the only time I remembered to pray was before eating, sometimes not even then. One of my favorite cousins once told me after the umpteenth bad experience I had that if he was in my shoes he would have committed suicide after the first round. He also said that it was given to me because I could handle it. Made sense. Still does. In fact it materializes what hope is for me. The belief that things will turn out better no matter what. The patriarchs all seem to have gone through mandatory periods of un-faith if you do a survey of the old testament. For some of them: their flocks perished, their women become barren, and their kids left to work elsewhere. The others had it even worse: their flocks left for greener pastures, their tribes disbanded and sought out capitalism, and the women demanded monogamy. But, no matter how bad it got, it appears that they never lost hope as evidenced by their prayers.

I think I was born with hope built in as a standard. Which, point in fact, is part of the reason while I'm still alive to write this essay for you. I've never lost hope, so I hope that brings you comfort whenever things get really rough, so that you may have hope. Hope is a circular thing it appears.

At this point it may appear that hope and faith seem to be interchangeable things, if not directly linked. I reiterate though, that for faith, one must recognize and understand what they trust that they have faith in. You can't just look at the Flying Spaghetti Monster and stamp your foot and say you have faith in him. You have to find out what's in the meatballs first. Hope on the other hand, is something you can't quite get rid off. Try to imagine if you will, what 'Hope' had to do, to survive in Pandora's box. Hope apparently has mad ninja skills. Hope and faith are distinct and yet they are distinctly linked because without both one cannot have love.

The problem with Love is that it is both a verb and a noun. So given that, I leave it to you to figure out what it is for you. It's different for everyone. I'll tell you though, when its real, faith and hope are in attendance. When you do fall in love, you won't say, "I heart you." You'll probably be shaking at the knees and be so overwhelmed that it comes out as a croak at first. Then because you have faith in what you feel and because you hope that she will reply kindly--it becomes an actualizing statement.

If you look at 1 Corinthians 13 you'll notice that even Paul of Tarsus mostly describes rather than defines what love is directly. Closer reading shows that he was actually laying down the conditions for what Agape meant in relation to being a Christian and living a life of selfless love; worshipful love. See how confusing defining what love is can get? Plus Agape was probably pretty far down the list for those old patriarchs anyway, don't you think? They were probably too busy trading eyes and teeth. What strikes me about Agape in relation to love is that when you read about it you get a sense of prayerful action. I think that's the ticket actually. For me real love is like a living prayer. Hope and faith become bread and salt for the way of a pilgrim. That's what happens when you start dealing with these modern terms like Agape. You end up referencing obscure anonymous literary works that involve an equally anonymous guy muttering prayers all across Russia.

There must be a common ground between the old and new when understanding and accepting love. I posit that, that ground employs faith and hope as grass and soil. Love is what you make of that earth you've been given to nurture. And we are ennobled to nourish it with a simple equation through an active life of prayer. We pray in faith out of a hope for love.

The answer to that equation, becomes your life.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Essays On Forgiveness: When Is Enough?

"How long 'til my soul gets it right, can any human being ever reach that kind of light?"
-Galileo, Indigo Girls

The capacity to endure seems to be directly proportional to the capacity for suffering. One Psychology lesson I remember very clearly is that pain is a personal thing. That, people suffer pain differently and individually. A pinprick for one person may be anguish for another. Does it follow then that the capacity for feeling or sustaining 'love' is the same? I conjecture to link the two concepts.

This scenario was placed before me in the past in discussion to which type of relationship scenario is optimal:

A) You love the other person more than they love you,
B) The other person loves you more than you love them,
C) Or the above choices are re-stated but according to sex (e.g. boy loves girl more than girl loves boy).

Link this with the terms: endure, suffer, sustain, and feeling and you'll be in a virtual quagmire. Based on experience, I think the whole thing stinks. Being philosophical about who loves who more and who can handle who's crap more so, is akin to arguing who gets which chicken part come carving time. You should be happy about getting any chicken at all in the first place.

I may be able to endure more pain because of what you put me through and you may know it--but so what? It still hurts. You may have shown more love in the past--but so what? Are you showing it now? While it may be important to understand that the person is in pain and it may be of value to acquiesce and leave them be--what about the fact that time does not stop? Those days wasted arguing or regretting back and forth should have instead been spent in striving for something better. In the same way, internally fretting about who loves who more is time better spent praying for that person's health and well-being don't you think?

Is it really about who has the capacity to love more and then whether it should be the man or the woman who is more enduring or long suffering? Are these plus points in heaven? No, they are not.

If you believe in reincarnation then you will have an eternity to get it right. What a waste of time that would be. Don't you agree? Clarity comes from acceptance. The acceptance that when you are in a relationship your own love will be tested. And with that acceptance must come the humility to offer it up--no matter what happens next.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Valentine's With Coral



















We are 'lucky we were given such a loving child.'




























Valentine's Day Brunch, Cooperative Father and Son Cooking














"Angels Vs. Devils" by Coral
Poster Paint on Board
















We both had too much dessert.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Tokens From A Heart Bled Dry: I Am Valentine's


St. Valentine's has always been my patron. The one annual figure stronger than the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, or even Santa. When I was young he lived in my mind as Cupid, as I got older his mythology enlarged to such a point that invoking him meant hope renewed. It will take an army to confront you with your own folly at being a hopeless romantic, believe me. And it will take that army years to make you admit that you are melancholy for it.

I can still clearly remember the crunch from the first bite into one of those heart shaped hard candies in ECLC. I don't think they make them anymore though, small pastel colored hard sugar with words like: love, sweetie, hearts, and cute pressed into them. Pressed into their hearts as it were. Then there was the first Valentine's card I ever received from my thoughtful mother, replete with hearts and glitter, as well. Shortly followed by cards from my two older sisters. It was a heady time--a child reveling in that first kind of innocent love. Red, white, and pink clothes de rigeur.

I remember a parade of Valentine's days--the countless botched Valentine's attempts of my youth in fact. Those I will share another time. What I want to recall is a particular Valentine's gift. The most important Valentine's Day Roses I had ever received--from my own sister--during one of those High School Send A Rose To Someone's Classroom Drives. I had never even considered being the recipient of roses throughout High School. Romance was for others, for me it was a hidden pain and an unrequited dream. Ditchie's gift of roses in 4th period Algebra during my sophomore year made me blush, but it taught me a valuable lesson. That perhaps the thoughtful love freely given by an older sister is the kind of love you should bring to the woman who accepts you. I took that lesson too deeply upon leaving High School I think. It also made me realize that being jealous of her having boyfriends was uncalled for. It made me realize that out of all of us, her brand of love was the best.

I also remember how Valentine's day was a secret link between my mother and myself in the past--she would make it a point to leave unique gifts for me every Valentine's day to find as I grew up. The most memorable being a combination lock for my school locker that had a pink heart for a cover. I wasn't able to use it though, it didn't fit properly. This may have set a trend I think. I think in her heart she could never truly let me go as her Valentine and my abrupt severing of that link broke her heart. I should have used that lock to keep those memories safe. Instead, growing up I added childhood photos to Valentine's gifts to a parade of women, photos which she had kept safe in a rosewood chest for her own heart. Photos of a young smiling me as a child.

Be my Valentine.

What is it to be a Valentine? What is it to deliver up what you feel for someone in words, cards, flowers, chocolates, and stuffed toys? What is it to be truly be alive on February 14? More importantly what is it to take out one day of the year and spend it with someone who you willingly give your self to? At what level, though, and at what cost?

This is the longest period that I have been officially single in my life. Being single is being honest, yet I feel that I am not being who I am meant to be...well that I believe anyhow...which is being a husband and a partner...which makes me sad, especially on this day.

Today I choose instead to be your Valentine. I will not say it. But I will leave cards for you to find and be encouraged. I will be here when you start falling in love. I will be here for when Cupid takes aim and misses.

Untitled

In this small room, these people have no names,
Their faces are blank with jealousy. They stand unquiet,
Shuffling their feet at the slightest touch.

There are times when it seems oppressive
And at times a selfish zone of comfort. I trust as much,
That the loneliness derived from pain,
Will keep this small, small room warm.

On Human Bondage

Many of us choose unknowingly to perpetuate generational sin. For some of us living in bondage provides a measure of comfort. For some of us the unseen chains replace the warmth of a real embrace.

Many of us are of the walking dead. We shock ourselves silly with the emotions derived from: hurt, betrayal, anger, and jealousy in an effort to move faster. We fail to see the bindings and chains that stop us from truly living in the first place. We fail to see them because we have forgotten that we have allowed them to be there in the first place. And so we continue to prod ourselves through others and through situations we have devised.

For most of us, the decision to let go and be free is akin to leaping off a bridge.
For some of us, the decision to stay behind and wait is necessary.

What do you do when it is stated that you live in a state of sin?
What will you do when you come of age and realize that you have a choice otherwise?

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

A Busy Whistler

I keep at it, such a busy whistler they see.
Walking in line for everyone to nod off.
I don't keep my hands in my pockets,
Neither do I let them hang limp.
I keep one as a fist,
The other one as a knife.
I walk quickly past the whispering,
When I walk, I walk with purpose.

Trigger Too Soon




















These things pull at me.
During the witching hour they stare me in the face,
And keep me company until I am dazed.

The sound of silence is a prelude to their arrival.
For even though I am strong,
I am but a memory expressed in the flesh.
Lord, why must I digress?

These days the senses, I fear, are talon sharp.
Leaving me dazzled and consumed,
They leave me reeling--shame faced.

After all there is nothing I can do.
Is it not my nature but to hope?
My ashes have yet to be consumed, my flesh to be burned.
Lord, why must I confess?

These words make me tremble,
They call me to flight with resolve,
And spurn these wings with jealous rage.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Subtle Knife: Strong Statements

Black: "Every morning, I get up and look through the 'Forbes' list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."

Grey:
...must be a well-thumbed copy.

Black: actually it is... : ) but it's always warren buffet, bill gates, Carlos Slim Helu, Indians, Chinese, Russians, nobody from our neighborhood...

Grey: ...you mean, no Filipinos on the list? You should see the Asian or World listing. Damn you SM!

Black: http://www.forbes.com/lists/2008/10/billionaires08_The-Worlds-Billionaires_Rank.html

Grey: Mind boggling. Damn you Lucio Tan (#785) and damn you Henry Sy (#843).

White: I can understand people wanting to be rich but nobody possibly needs BILLIONS. If all these Billionaires restricted themselves to just 1 billion & redistributed the rest all the people in the world would be well-fed, educated & have access to good healthcare. There would be no need for war, We'd have millions more doctors & scientists & global society would advance very quickly towards more wealth and care to all. Ans this attitude coming from a capitalist! Sigh...

Grey: "Touché!" Said the rat to the cat.

White: we have no other choice but to wake up each day and ask ourselves "should i stay in bed and sleep or go to work and get paid?" - and that's every single day! sigh!
---

Always make sure to verify your statements before releasing them.

This New Thing I've Discovered Called Blogging

Tatat Clemeno mentioned that this blog is "very personal...which is a must" which scares me. I've always been reprimanded for wearing my heart on my sleeve (I hate clichés). She continued by saying, "It's another way of saying I taste Cush when I read his blogs."

I hope I'm Umami.
...
Hi to Graham Brutus! Trebuchet it is!

Untitled

Sampaguita blossoms strewn across the garden floor;
The devils have come to rest.

Instead of anger, let love speak
Instead of ego, let compassion reign
Instead of regret, start again.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Observations On Gifts For Others


  • Make sure that it is something that you, yourself, would want or truly appreciate, if it was you receiving it.
  • Practicality is high up on the hierarchy of needs for this subject, so it would be a good thing if it was made well and is useful.
  • Choose a gift that will make the receiver remember you with a smile when they use it or better yet choose a gift that makes you smile that you gave it (hint: the joy of giving...).
  • Flowers wither, but sometimes, only flowers are the right gift.
  • Don't give yourself a hernia by pursuing a 'unique' gift or 'the perfect gift.'
  • Wrap it yourself (it's a great skill to have, like packing luggage correctly) and do take time in doing so. Real boxes, paper tissue, wrapping paper, and ribbons (red ribbon when in doubt) are a joy for the receiver.
  • Make sure to personally write a note or dedication (don't type it) to go with it. Make it legible. Also, do not just put "To:" and "From."
  • Once a gift is given. Let go of it.

My Own Meme: "Touché," said The Rat to the Cat.

Are we all thoroughly sick of the "Random 25 Things On Your Wall, Tag You're It!"-type posts yet? In a small stab at Internet meme-dom, I have decided to flog this line as much as possible.

As such, am endeavoring to make this into THE repartee...or riposte. Get it? Get it? Repartee? Riposte?

"Touché!" Said the rat to the cat.


Bon mot!

*I wish I knew what the shortcut for "é" was. This quip has a great story attached to it by the way.


Wordle: Touche Said The Rat To The Cat

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Titanoboa Cerrejonensis: It Snacked On Crocodiles

This snake ruled the earth after the dinosaurs disappeared. It grew up to more than 45 feet long.

"Jonathan Bloch, of the University of Florida, was one of the researchers who analysed the remains of the snake, the biggest that ever lived.

He said: “It was not only the biggest predator in the region, as far as we know, but it was the largest terrestrial vertebrate known on the face of the planet for at least 10 million years."

Titanoboa (meaning "Titan Boa") was a genus of snake that lived approximately 60 to 58 million years ago, in the Paleocene period.[1] The only known species was Titanoboa cerrejonensis, the largest snake ever discovered.[1] By comparing the sizes and shapes of its fossilized vertebrae to those of modern snakes, researchers estimated that T. cerrejonensis was around 13 metres (43 ft) long, weighed more than 1,100 kilograms (2,400 lb), and measured about 1 metre (3.3 ft) wide at the thickest point on the snake's body. The fossils of 28 individual T. cerrejonensis were found in the coal mines of Cerrejón in northern Colombia in 2009.[1][2] Prior to this discovery, few fossils of Paleocene-period vertebrates had been found in ancient tropical environments of South America.[3]

The snake was discovered on an expedition by a team of international scientists led by Jonathan Bloch, a University of Florida vertebrate paleontologist, and Carlos Jaramillo, a paleobotanist from the Smithsonian Tropical Research Institute in Panama.[4]

“It had a very low metabolic rate,” Dr. Head said.

View the original article at Times.co.uk here.
View the Wikipedia article here.
View the GlobeandMail.com article here.

A vertebra from a modern Anaconda boid compared with the type vertebra of Titanoboa.
Photo by Ray Carson, UF News Bureau. From the UF press release.

View this picture's (above) original article here.


A handout photo released by Nature magazine shows a Precloacal vertebra of an adult Green Anaconda (Eunectes murinus),lighter colored vertebra dwarfed by a vertebra of the giant boid snake they named Titanoboa cerrejonensis, meaning ``titanic boa from Cerrejon,'' the region where it was found. Fossils from northeastern Colombia reveal the biggest snake ever discovered: a behemoth that stretched 42 feet or longer, reaching an estimated 1.27 tons. (AP Photo/University of Florida) Kenneth Krysko)

View this picture's (above) original article here.

I bet in your time they discover Yggdrasil.




What is this thing called bitterfruit? What does it taste like? Do you know? Does the Shadow's nose?

In Memoriam: Helio Gracie (October 1, 1913 – January 29, 2009)

What inspires me is how productive he was with his life.
Thank you.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

A Curious Wednesday

The thing with revelations is that you already know of them.
What you have to figure out is not really what will happen next,
But how true the statements actually are.

There is no better way to attract live food if you are a carnivorous flower,
Then by being pretty.

A Curious Wednesday.

...And you will still be hungry.
Feed your heart to free your mind.

A Curious Wednesday.

The issue with music is that when it plays as a background inside your head, it becomes insidious. Of all the senses, we rely on sight the most, but the sound of pain is something that always lies right beneath the surface. We subconsciously or even consciously attach certain songs to certain emotions or people. We create a lifetime of these connections to music.

Now I know why I've been listening to music that has no lyrics for the past few years. When you hear lyrics that strike a cord, you hear that pain all over again. Seeing is painful, but hearing wounds.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

No Letting Go

When you learn to let go so you can hold on tight--
Music becomes real and dancing becomes right.
"Check the news, I was reported dead an hour ago."

No sign of life, this one will need a miracle.
-RST, 7:28am MNL, 03FEB2009

Monday, February 2, 2009

Shotokan: Niju Kun

  1. Karate-do begins and ends with rei
    空手道は礼に始まり礼に終る事を忘るな
    Karate-do wa rei ni hajimari rei ni owaru koto a wasaru na
  2. There is no first strike in karate
    空手に先手なし
    Karate ni sente nashi
  3. Karate stands on the side of justice
    空手は義の補け
    Karate wa, gi no taske
  4. First know yourself, then know others
    先づ自己を知れ而して他を知れ
    Mazu onore o shire, shikashite ta o shire
  5. Mentality over technique
    技術より心術
    Gijitsu yori shinjitsu
  6. The mind must be set free
    心は放たん事を要す
    Kokoro wa hanatan koto o yosu
  7. Calamity springs from carelessness
    禍は懈怠に生ず
    Wazawai wa ketai ni seizu
  8. Karate goes beyond the dojo
    道場のみの空手と思ふな
    Dojo nomino karate to omou na
  9. Karate is a lifelong pursuit
    空手の修業は一生である
    Karate-do no shugyo wa isssho de aru
  10. Apply the way of karate to all things. Therein lies its beauty
    凡ゆるものを空手化せよ其処に妙味あり
    Ara yuru mono o karateka seyo; sokoni myomi ari
  11. Karate is like boiling water; without heat, it returns to its tepid state
    空手は湯の如し絶えず熱度を与えざれば元の水に還る
    Karate Wa Yu No Gotoku Taezu Netsu O Atae Zareba Motono Mizuni Kaeru
  12. Do not think of winning. Think, rather, of not losing
    勝つ考は持つな負けぬ考は必要
    Katsu kangae wa motsuna; makenu kangae wa hitsuyo
  13. Make adjustments according to your opponent
    敵に因って轉化せよ
    Tekki ni yotte tenka seyo
  14. The outcome of a battle depends on how one handles emptiness and fullness (weakness and strength)
    戦は虚実の操縦如何に在り
    Tattakai wa kyo-jitsu no soju ikan ni ari
  15. Think of hands and feet as swords
    人の手足を剣と思へ
    Hi to no te-ashi wa ken to omoe
  16. When you step beyond your own gate, you face a million enemies
    男子門を出づれば百万の敵あり
    Danshi mon o izureba hyakuman no teki ari
  17. Kamae is for beginners; later, one stands in shizentai
    構は初心者に後は自然体
    Kamae wa shoshinsha ni atowa shizentai
  18. Perform kata exactly; actual combat is another matter
    形は正しく実戦は別物
    Kata wa tadashiku, jisen wa betsumono
  19. Do not forget the employment of withdrawal of power, the extension or contraction of the body, the swift or leisurely application of technique
    力の強弱体の伸縮技の緩急を忘るな
    Chikara no kyojaku tai no shinshuku waza no kankyu
  20. Be constantly mindful, diligent, and resourceful, in your pursuit of the Way
    常に思念工夫せよ
    Tsune ni shinen ku fu seyo
These lessons make sense.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

A Half Life

Or your bitterness and ambivalence;
Your fence sitting that shuns the dawn.
Your self blinding stubbornness that flees from the new day.
A half life.

Your choice of twilight, peeling walls and forgotten truths.
You have forgotten too much and have cherished even less.
All your calories empty.

09JAN2009

And When You Wake

Sleep deep and long
And when you wake, let my name be the first word from your lips.
And when you wake, let my slow smile be your first memory.

UFC94: Not Having Access To The Live Telecast Is No Excuse

http://mma.fanhouse.com/2009/01/31/ufc-94-live-blog-georges-st-pierre-vs-b-j-penn-2-machida-vs/

Georges St. Pierre def. B.J. Penn by fourth-round TKO
Lyoto Machida def. Thiago Silva by first-round knockout
Jon Jones def. Stephan Bonnar by unanimous decision
Karo Parisyan def. Dong Hyun Kim by split decision
Clay Guida def. Nate Diaz by split decision
Jon Fitch def. Akihiro Gono by unanimous decision
Dan Cramer def. Matt Arroyo by split decision
Jake O'Brien def. Christian Wellisch by split decision
John Howard def. Chris Wilson by split decision
Thiago Tavares def. Manny Gamburyan by unanimous decision

I wonder what arts you will have studied and tried out. Hopefully not Taekwondo. Just kidding. I hope you will have enjoyed and persevered in your pursuit of The Way. I will always be ready to teach you a thing or two...like that Brazilian kick (Maha Geri/ Kubi Geri/ Kobi Geri) you always make me do.

Ack! 80's Panic Attack, I Just Had Too!

Hands To Heaven
Breathe

As I watch you move, across the moonlit room
There's so much tenderness in your loving
Tomorrow I must leave, the dawn knows no reprieve
God give me strength when I am leaving...
So raise your hands to heaven and pray
That we'll be back together someday
Tonight, I need your sweet caress
Hold me in the darkness
Tonight, you calm my restlessness
You relieve my sadness
As we move to embrace, tears run down your face
I whisper words of love, so softly
I can't believe this pain, it's driving me insane
Without your touch, life will be lonely
So raise your hands to heaven and pray
That we'll be back together someday
Tonight, I need your sweet caress
Hold me in the darkness
Tonight, you calm my restlessness
You relieve my sadness
Morning has come, another day
I must pack my bags and say goodbye...

When you were around 7 you liked singing a particular song on Karaoke. It's on the tip of my tongue.
"Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is, than falling in love in a quite absolute, final way.

What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you will do with your evenings, how you will spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.

Fall in love, stay in love and it will decide everything."